27 Jul Is My Living in Vain?: The Intersection of Church and Community

BY KELSEY BROWN

When Ufuoma Essi moved to Philadelphia in 2016 for a year-long study abroad program from London, she wasn’t making art or films. Now, Essi reflects on that time as helping her “explore filmmaking as a real possibility.”

“Philadelphia has been super formative for me,” Essi says. “I was studying in Philly, but beyond studying, I was going out and watching films, speaking to filmmakers. [I] was more so being inspired by the city. That’s when I first started making experimental films.” 

Essi’s recent art film Is My Living in Vain? is part of an exhibition for London’s Gasworks. Essi’s film explores the interconnections between music, the gentrified streets of Philadelphia and London, and the close-knit community within Black churches that prevail despite the encroachment. The documentary is brief but breathes the soulful vocals of Gospel, reflecting the complex and multifaceted role of music within the church.

“No religion can survive without music,” one man in the film reflects.

Since 2019, the idea for the film has existed in fragmented pieces inside Essi, who was inspired to capture how the intersections of community and church, as well as music, resist gentrification and change. When the Gasworks exhibition commissioned Essi to work on the piece, it was the push she needed to develop her ideas and embark on her research.

Through observing churches in communities across Philadelphia, while also mapping out the changing landscapes in the area, Essi began connecting her research. “Gentrification is at the forefront of everyday life in London,” Essi says, but it wasn’t until she was back in Philly filming that she realized how central the theme of gentrification would be in her piece. She hadn’t been to Philly since before the pandemic, and was interested to see how churches had changed and what was driving those changes.

Essi says it was an organic process to connect the similarities between these different diasporic communities. Essi studied American history with emphasis on urban studies at University College London, where she explored the global connections of Black American music throughout genres, time, and location, like techno and jazz. Essi has done a lot of work around Black performance history, like gospel music, and was curious about the integral role music plays in community and church—not just the gospel music itself, but how it is actually performed in service, the sermon, and gospel.

In London, there is a culture around attending church on Sunday, Essi explained, saying, “The church is your community.” In Philadelphia, Essi noticed a similar culture around churches being community hubs and how they were similarly run.

When Essi returned to Philadelphia in 2022 to film, she had a map of churches throughout the city connected to how different areas had changed. She was specifically interested in the Community Baptist Church of West Philadelphia, and how that church, alongside others, have remained despite external factors like gentrification. On Sundays, Essi and her producer would visit various churches and talk about their project.

In the face of gentrification and external changes, Black churches were resilient in creating space for their communities. The multifaceted impact of Black churches—which hold influence religiously, socially, economically, culturally—has “emancipatory potential.” 

Despite churches being such a prominent force in life, Essi says that “church” is an institution that isn’t often seen as political, or multifaceted. Shot on 16 mm film, combined with archival imagery, the film organically weaves together footage across Black churches in Philadelphia and London. Viewers are physically transported from the city streets inside Black churches, where the film shifts between intimate reflections on the impact of the church, to gospel music being rehearsed on lawns and in rooms with stained-glass windows. It’s clear the church exists as more than a once-a-week Sunday appointment. 

“The church is one of the kinds of institutions that remains despite lots of changes, but it has more than one role,” Essi says. “It’s like a community center. It can be a food bank. So I was interested in seeing how they operate in the community [and] what kind of role they play.”

For Sarah-Tai Black, a Hotdocs International Mid-length Programmer, Is My Living in Vain? sparked inspiration.

“It’s an amazing look at the Black cultural history of church sites and a not-to-be-missed film from one of our best contemporary Black woman filmmakers,” Black says.

Is My Living in Vain? is displayed in Gasworks gallery in London. The gallery has partnerships with a gallery in New Zealand and France, where the film is currently being shown. After the show ends, Essi is still navigating where the film will live post-exhibition. The film will be screened at the 2023 BlackStar Film Festival taking place in Philadelphia, August 2-6.

*Featured Image: Image of the exhibition of Is My Living in Vain? at Gasworks in London. Image credit: Andy Keate.

---

Kelsey Brown (she/her) is a freelance journalist and photographer based in Long Beach, California. Her words and photography have been featured in publications like Documentary magazine, Tagg magazine, and INTO More.